I’m Not Black. My Person is.

I feel sick today. Disgusted. And I'm talking about it.

I've been stopped by cops for speeding, but never once have I had to question how it would play out. The cop would write me a ticket (even if I'm crying) and send me on my way. I live my life with the sense of security that someone is not going to abuse their power and end my life. And because of this white privilege (which it is), some people think that I don't have the jurisdiction to speak on the subject of the murder of black men at the hands of cops.

Well I do.

My husband- my partner for the past 15 years and the father of my children (the children who will one day ask me why cops are killing people that look like Daddy) is black.

He also happens to be 6'3 and 250 pounds. Will a cop cross paths with him one night and feel threatened by his stature? Then what? Murder? I can't believe that this is an actual thought that I have to consider.

But I do consider it because it's reality.

People witnessed what can only be described as a blatant, disgusting, and intentional abuse of power. They watched a murder, right in front of their eyes. They pleaded with the (former) officer to stop and nothing happened.

Who should you call when a police officer is murdering someone in front of your eyes? The police?

This has to stop and should absolutely be protested. However, the disgusting violence against George Floyd is being protested with violence towards police officers who had absolutely nothing to do with his horrible murder-police officers that do serve and protect their communities and who have spouses and children to go home to. And today, we are talking about riots across the country and not the murder of George Floyd. We're not seeing his face and learning about his life, we're watching fires burn and windows kicked in. That's the story now.

I understand the utter and complete frustration that leads to these acts of retaliatory violence. I do. I just don't want the narrative to change to “Riots and Curfews" from "Murder by Cop."

And no, I'm not black. My person is.